Celine Dion - Taking Chances
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CD Details
Artist: Celine DionEdition: Music CD
Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language)
CD Release Date: 2007-11-13
Model: N03-012152
Music Label: Sony
Product features:
- DION CELINE TAKING CHANCES
- Taking Chances
- Alone
- Eyes On Me
- My Love
- Shadow Of Love
- Surprise Surprise
- This Time
- New Dawn
- A Song For You
- A World To Believe In
- Can't Fight The Feelin'
- I Got Nothin' Left
- Right Next To The Right One
- Fade Away
- That's Just The Woman In Me
- Skies Of L.A.
Music reviews of Taking Chances
Music Review: (wait for it) YOU AAAAAAAAREEEEEEEE [somewhere, glass is breaking]
Rating: 1 Stars
The vast majority of grieving customers who leave anti-Celion Dion messages condemning her for her latest CD's apparent shortcomings are completely misconstruing the facts. Celine Dion DOES NOT--I repeat, DOES NOT--deserve denunciation for this, her latest CD entitled Taking Chances. Rather, and this is the more proper interpretation to make, she deserves rebuke, condemnation AND censure for ALL CDs she's ever put out over the course of her entire career!!!! However, since this review is for Taking Chances, I will strictly reserve my righteous criticism for Dion as it relates to Taking Chances.
Let me open up my withering yet constructive criticism by renouncing Celine on her absolutely abhorrent lack of songwriting skills!!!! Do any of the folks who subserviently worship and listen to Celine even comprehend the time-honored, musical tradition of songwriting???? For those not in the know, songwriting is the truest measure of an artist because it directly gauges the merit of an artist as it relates to their ability to draw in the listener with interesting lyrics; be "catchy" (oh-so important since songs need to please the ear instead of reading like dry poems); and produce a swell sound structure. Celine horrifically FAILS on all three of these counts one needs to satisfy in order to be a respectable artist. No, Celine certainly is no Alice in Chains, Tool, Iron Maiden, or even the ridiculously lovable, nerd-group Weezer, all of whom at least write their own songs.
Celine has never, ever written a song on her own; she's always leaned on others like a crutch to write material for her. This is because of her elitist disease known as being a snobbish diva; as a diva, she assumes she can get by on her voice alone, a misconception I'll crush later on in my indomitable review. Taking Chances features THIRTY-TWO different "collaborators" who had to allow Celine to ride on their coattails since they wrote all the songs for her. Celine is truly nothing but a charlatan who has no fundamentally deep, artistic skills. It gets even worse from hereon in! Celine's also a phony in that she includes lots of covers of songs (read: misappropriations) on her CDs. Taking Chances alone has FOUR cover songs: Alone originally by Heart, New Dawn originally by no-name Linda Perry, Right Next to the Right One originally by foreigner Tim Christensen, and That's Just the Woman in Me originally by obscure nobodies Katrina and the Waves.
Celine Dion exclusively appeals to "people" (used very loosely) who are sentimentalist fools who easily get "moved" by frivolously interpreted notions of romance and love. I should know, because I've had clear-cut, sensitive, personal experience with just such phenomenon.
Personal story time: my ex-girlfriend (sorry, I'm no liberal girlie-man so I can't write ex-boyfriend) was just such an aforementioned, gullibly moved, sentimentalist fool who used to get off on Celine Dion songs, mainly because it's the nature of skirts to be so sappy (also proved by the number of female Celine fans here). Besides spending MY hard-earned money on the Home Shopping Network, she also wanted to constantly "snuggle" (or is it termed more politically correctly as "spooning?") while crying her eyes out to Celine songs!!!! Well, one day--after a pretty hellish tenure of listening to that aggravating Titanic song over and over again!--I just SNAPPED and told her to get the hell out! That's right: "Get the hell out of my life!" I roared and thundered. I proverbially kicked her to the curb, ridding myself once and for all of noxious, Celine-fan influence.
You'll sympathize with my decision once you, too, know the exact depravity contained within Celine Dion lyrics, as I'll now go into detail to explain why my "excommunication" of my ex-girlfriend due to her over-listening of Celine Dion was oh-so justifiable.
Don't know much about your life.
Don't know much about your world, but
Don't want to be alone tonight,
On this planet they call earth.
This is the 1st verse in Taking Chances. Ooooo, it's so deep and profound and...NOT! It's so hackneyed and pathetic that even train-wrecks like Britney seem like poets compared to Celine.
Or, try this on for size:
You call a tragedy
Is just another day to me
For my heart beats with fear
As his footsteps draw near
This is the 2nd verse from This Time. It's flagrantly obvious that Celine is a proponent of MISANDRY because the lyrics insinuate a woman fearing for her life as a man's footsteps draw near!!!! Curse Celine for being sexist and chauvinistic!!!!
With my ex-girlfriend forcing me to listen to torturously melodramatic lyrics like this non-stop, you can see why I'd to dump her.
Lastly, I need to censure Celine for her WORST of all trespasses...and I've outlined some pretty heavy ones already. Celine is GUILTY of being anti-US military as she derided US Iraq policy back in Sept. of 05, as she appeared on Larry King while covering herself by pretending to make a teary plea for Hurricane Katrina victims. How DARE this Canadian-dependent-on-US-welfare to have cursed Iraq policy prematurely, when now--thanks to Bush and Petraeus--the Surge is working like a dream!!!!
Description of Taking Chances
Brand new 14-song studio album featuring such songwriters and producers as John Shanks, Ben Moody (formerly of Evanescence), Linda Perry, and Ne-Yo.Taking Chances is not without its daring moments--we'll get to those--but the first order of business in any review of this much-hyped record, on which Celine Dion is said to have slunk away from her songbird instincts in favor of embracing her inner rock & roll wild child, should be fan reassurance. Therefore: fear not. Taking Chances has its share of poignant, pretty ballads (both "A Song for You" and "Right Next to the Right One" are goosebump-raisers) and love songs (the hopeful, heartfelt title track, which unfolds into an anthemic power ballad midway through, may be the best one). As far as standard Celine fare goes, in fact, Chances is likely her strongest non-French outing since 2002's A New Day Has Come; nobody unfolds a lyric with more care or nuance. And, as the subtle "My Love" deftly proves, any early-career instincts to over-sing have gone poof along with her '90s-era, sweet-natured-kook persona. Because it's a generous 16 songs long, it may even be possible to ignore the non-Celine-like moments on Taking Chances and just enjoy the more fan-faithful tracks. But that wouldn't be any fun, would it? There are songs here--"Can't Fight the Feelin'," "Fade Away," "That's Just the Woman In Me"--that will astound diehards and make fans of those who've dissed her for more than a decade. If you didn't think the diva behind Disney's "Beauty and the Beast" had it in her to screech from the bottom of her soul, a la Janis Joplin, flip to track 15 and guess again. --Tammy La Gorce
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